It was half a year ago when Achashveirosh, King of Persia, began his lavish party in the empire’s capital, Shushan (Incidentally, many expect this party was, at least in part, designed to tempt Jews into coming to the party and sinning against G-d in various ways- particularly, by participating despite Achashveirosh’s use of the former Beis-Hamikdash’s vessels as food utensils). His legendary affair took an unexpected turn, however, when Vashti, his queen, refused his order to come before him and his guests to show off her beauty. Unconfirmed rumors have it that Vashti had suddenly grown a tail, among other hideous features, that caused her to refrain, though most agree that this was a direct act of defiance on her part in response to Achashveirosh’s dominating attitude. Upon consultation with his advisors, most notably, Haman (who has, incidentally, just been appointed the royal vizier), Achashveirosh decided that he must kill Vashti and send out an order that all men are in charge of their wives. Our reporters have found that these actions were made on the basis of Haman’s advice, as he told the king that if he did not act in this manner, people would think that the king couldn’t control his own wife, and wives would start dominating their husbands. This, of course, made Achashveirosh a laughingstock (privately, of course), as his making a big deal out of the incident appears unnecessary and even foolish on his part. It is clear that the intention in Achashveirosh’s party was to earn the respect and admiration of his people and officials, but this foolish outburst seems to have undone these effects significantly. In any case, Achashveirosh immediately sent out orders for all single women to appear before him for the selection of a new queen. Each woman will receive one year of complimentary beauty treatment prior to their evaluation. We will have more on this story as it unfolds.

 

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